It's 9 december 2010

now we R going to pass this 2010 and face the new year 2011.
this 2010. december is the year i'll remember till the end of my life.
it's 9 december,2010.
in the morning around 6 a.m,i found my dad didn't breath anymore.
he has passed away.
that time,it's like I am dreaming.
I don't believe that my dad has left me forever.
I kept calling him.
I kept shaking his body.
but it's the same,no answer came out from his mouth.

then,I pass my five days in the house where he is put-we call it "rumah duka".
Everyday,I imagine that he is still alive.
then,I realise that he is not here anymore.
then I started to cry again.
I don't want to cry,because,if  I cry,my mother will cry too.
so,when I started to cry,I'll go somewhere else where there's nobody.

then,after 10 days,I miss my dad.
I want to see him.
untill now,I still miss him.
when I pass a place that he has been there before,my tears will fall down.

there's a night when I felt all of this is just a dream.
I closed my eyes then I opened eyes. then I went inside my parents'bedroom.
Inside the room,I just can see my mom.
there's no daddy. then I began to cry again.
this isnot a dream,but I wish it is...